A Program for Me, By Me

As of this month, I have been on a healing journey for three years now. I didn’t know it was going to become a healing journey when I first started. I fully expected, and hoped, that maybe, finally, I would be able to function. That was it. I just wanted to be able to function at a more optimal level.

I wanted to not use self-destructive coping methods in order to get through the day. I wanted to be confronted with problems I could actually solve. I wanted to not feel trapped and tortured, painful, and alone, hopeless and helpless.

I really didn’t think that was asking too much.

And so, the journey started…

It has been tough. Really, really tough. Tough enough that there have been many times I would have quit. If the alternative of being stuck and in pain was not as prevalent and ruining my life or the opportunity to even have a life.

But then I encountered what so many of us who are struggling with mental illness do; trying to find a way to survive, and trying to find the help to get us there.

Help is out there BUT it is not easy to get. There are referrals and wait lists and that’s if you even find the program for your needs in the first place. It’s a tiring, lengthy, often fruitless endeavour when searching for help and treatment for mental illness.

And whereas I have been fortunate enough to get into a few programs that helped, it wasn’t enough. I needed more. And the more just wasn’t there. Which brings me to my reason for doing this.

I spent over a year, reading and compiling from approximately three dozen books on trauma and healing — from somatic therapy to meditation to narrative therapy to art therapy. I’ve found lists of coping strategies, skills, tools, and techniques. And with what I have found and compiled I think it will make an enormous impact in my recovery and healing.

In short, it is the program I haven’t been able to find. So I created my own program for me, by me.

And I think it may be able to help others as well. If I can benefit, maybe you can too. That’s why I’m starting this blog. So I can post everything I’ve found in the hopes that maybe it will help you on your own recovery or healing journey.

There will be A LOT of ideas and approaches here and some might help you and some might not, so what I want to say, and to close this first post, Take what you need and leave the rest.

And to those in recovery and healing I wish you all the best.

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